The new thing is that each luncheon has a theme. Last month, the theme was President's Day. The Warden was assigned fruit, so he took red, white and blue fruit to share.
March is the Warden's month to plan the luncheon. He was challenged not to make the theme "St. Patrick's Day." The following is the letter he sent to all of the other principals in regard to their assignments (the names have been changed to protect the innocent):
"First - I feel the need to thank [Principal F] for the challenge of moving beyond St Patrick's Day as we prepare for lunch next week. I've learned some amazing things this evening about some very important days in March....
"Did you know that March is known for:
- Irish American Month
- Music in Our Schools Month
- National Craft Month
- National Frozen Food Month
- National Irish American Heritage Month- designated by Congress in 1995.
- National Nutrition Month
- National Peanut Month
- National Women's History Month
- Red Cross Month
- Social Workers Month
"With that in mind, I'd like to propose the following assignments based on some very important days in March (I hope the themes are obvious - If you don't get it, do what you want... who would know the difference?):
"[Principal S], [Principal W], and [Principal M]: Please prepare a main dish in honor of March 1 (National Pig Day) and March 7 (National Roast of Pork Day) or March 19 (Poultry Day)
"[Principal V] and [Principal C]: Please prepare a salad in honor of March 11 (Johnny Appleseed Day) or March 3 (Peach Blossom Day) or March 26 (Make Up Your Own Holiday Day)
"[Principal H]: Please bring something in honor of March 14 (National Potato Chip Day) or March 23 (National Chip and Dip Day)
"[Principal M]: Please provide drinks in honor of March 30 (I'm in Control Day) or March 2nd (Old Stuff Day) or March 31 (Bunsen Burner Day)... There wasn't a good 'drink day' in March. Sorry!!
"[The Warden]: We will provide cups, plates, and napkins in honor of March 17 (St Patrick's) or March 18 (Goddess of Fertility Day) or March 22 (National Goof Off Day)
"[Principal O]: Please provide dessert in honor of one of these days: March 28 (National Something on a Stick Day) or March 14 (National Pi day - 3.14), or March 20 (Extraterrestrial Abductions Day)
"District Office: - This one is for you [Assistant Superintendent] - Be creative - Please provide a snack or two honoring March 3 (If Pets Had Thumbs Day), March 8 (Popcorn Lover's Day), and/or March 5th (Multiple Personalities Day)
"For all: Please be sure to bring things that would support March 11 for lunch while we serve ourselves.
"There are some other days that didn't make it to the lunch table, but are pretty appropriate right now in our lives:
"Politicians both Democrats and Republicans: March 29
Our Budget: March 9 and March 15 (there are two on this day for this one that fit)
[MC]: March 4
Our schools each day: March 15
"Perhaps after we eat these amazing foods we can go out and celebrate March 30
"I think I've got it covered....
"If you don't believe me about these days and would like to know what the listed days above might be, just check out this 100% accurate site in your spare time:
"See you Thursday!!"
Still wondering why he didn't just base it all on "If Pets Had Thumbs Day." I know we'll be celebrating that one at our house. Wonder what April's theme will be....