Update on Mission Prep

It's been awhile since I've given an update on #1 and her mission preparation. I'm sure, if you spoke
with her, she'd give you the exact number of days until her departure. Then she'd assure you that it's not because she's thrilled to leave her home and family (heh heh, yah right) that she knows the exact number, but it's because whenever she signs into the website that lists what she needs to do to be prepared, the first thing listed, under her name and mission she's been assigned to, is a countdown of days until she leaves in big numbers, and believe it or not, like it or not, that number gets smaller everyday.

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We're, at this point, waiting for immunizations. The doctor's office gave her a hard time about needing an additional dtap booster, but she will get one when she goes in to get her typhoid pills. These have to be taken one pill every other day for two weeks. I've read of missionaries who've timed it wrong and have been sick as they've entered the MTC. That would be miserable, but the clinic is saying she can pick them up on June 1st. I'm figuring this should give her four days to feel any effects before she leaves. I hope this is the case.

Her friends that have had to take the typhoid pills have had no ill effects. I'm hoping that for her as well. We shall see.

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In the meantime, the only other thing she has been assigned to do before she leaves is obtain a four-generation pedigree chart and stories of her ancestors.

I thought this was a very interesting assignment. This was not something I was assigned way back in my day, and it makes me wonder if this is something all missionaries are asked to do. Then you wonder why.

There is no doubt that the LDS faith believes strongly in family. We believe that unlike the typical "until death do you part," marriage should last throughout eternity. As someone coined in General Conference, marriage shouldn't start out with an "expiration date." We believe that families should be joined together throughout eternity through ordinances performed in our temples.

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Side note: For anyone in the Portland area, we now have a visitor's center at our temple. It teaches what a temple is for. Anyone can go. It's open every day of the year. For any of my friends, if you want to go but don't want to go alone, let me know. I'll take you.

So, maybe #1, through sharing her own genealogy, can inspire others to do the same thus encouraging them to bind their family together past this life.

This morning, though, I came upon another reality....

I LOVE chapter 12 in the book of Ether. It is my favorite in the whole Book of Mormon. Seriously, to the point that I honestly get excited as I get closer to it. I can't tell  you why I love it so much. It just makes me happy.

In chapter 12, Moroni (the abridger of these metal plates), interjects some of his own feelings about what is going on and what can be perceived because of what has been read so far in the Book of Mormon. He shares the importance of faith and makes things VERY clear as to what the force was in each situation that we've read about thus far.

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As I read this morning, something became very obvious to me. Throughout the book, we are told to remember the things God has done for our ancestors--the things that have brought us to the point where we are today. Time after time, we are drawn back to Moses freeing the children of Israel through God's power, as just one example. In the book of Ether, reminders of the brother of Jared, and his experiences come into play. Could it be that an example is being set for us to remember?

Could this be another reason why #1 has been asked to gather stories about her ancestors? Could it be for her? To give her strength? Could it be to empower her?

In this chapter, Moroni is doing just what the Book of Mormon encourages us to do--remember. It doesn't just stop at the brother of Jared or Moses. It goes on and on and on with great examples.

So, for this morning, here's something for my family to know. Something I had no clue of until about five years ago thanks to a cousin who isn't a member of the church.

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My dad's family is from Montana, the bitterroot. A cousin searched the archives of the Missoula newspaper as she and I were working scanning pictures for my mom's side of the family (she is related through my mom; yet another reason why this is so significant to me). Do you kind of see how all of the stars align so nicely here?

Here is the story she found. One I would never have known if it weren't for her:


"Most people who were not Mormons were uninterested in the missionaries' message, but occasional contacts with those who were receptive, like George and Aquilla Dye, ranchers in Corvallis, restored their enthusiasm. Having recently dreamed of two men who visited her ranch with an important message, Aquilla welcomed the two missionaries who approached her home seeking lodging and food one evening. Within a short time the Dyes had embraced Mormonism, providing the nucleus for a Sunday School in Corvallis that would eventually grow into a branch congregation. In their sermons and in reports they sent to the mission headquarters, the missionaries also related accounts of faith-promoting healings following priesthood blessings. For instance, one missionary who visited the Dyes' home in 1898 shortly after their conversion "found a house full of sickness." Aquilla requested a priesthood blessing for each member of the family, following which each claimed that they "were instantly releaved [sic] of pain." The telling and retelling of such stories nurtured a sense of identity among local Mormons as a divinely favored people caring for each other."


This is part of how my family became acquainted with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. George and Aquilla were my great, great grandparents.

Maybe a funny thing to have in a town newspaper, but back then, you probably knew that Mrs. Jones had walked her dog five times in one day or Mr. McGillicuddy got a paper cut from reading that very newspaper the day before. You know "all the news that is news."

Regardless, I am grateful that this was recorded. I am grateful for Aquilla's dream. This story helps me to know that God was aware of George and Aquilla the same as He is of me, and because He was aware of them, my life has benefitted greatly by their actions.

There are stories like this on each of the branches of my family tree (my mom, my grandfather in my dad's side, my great, great grandparents on my dad's mom's side, and my great, great, great grandparents on my dad's mom's mom's side), and that's not even bringing the Warden's family into the equation. I look forward to helping #1 find these stories and more. Maybe we'll end up with our own personalized version of Ether 12 and how our ancestors had faith enough to move on impressions they had. And, maybe those acts of faith with help us as well and give us strength to try to do as they did.

So, maybe this is why #1 needs to gather these stories. Maybe it's to encourage the friends she has yet to make in the Philippines. Maybe it's to give her courage and strength to know that she can help people draw closer to God as He reaches out to them. I get the feeling that it's all of these reasons combined.

So a couple shots and a whole lotta stories, and she'll be on a plane and outta here. Daunting.

Oh, and just to let you know....45 days.

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The Never-ending Three-Legged Race

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As I mentioned, the Warden and I created a list of qualities we could envision for a couple that would make it through eternity. Here is that basic list. Bear with me on this, though. I took notes as the Warden and I each contributed our ideas. Some things aren't clear, but I will try to explain as best I can.....

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There is a level of consistency; not monotony, but some agreed upon practices or behaviors that are just accepted and expected (ex. scripture study, prayer, Family Home Evening, service--not just for others but for each other) - This was one of the Warden's ideas. I LOVE that he mentioned the idea of monotony as he knows that that's one of my true weaknesses. I like life to have some amount of variety to it.

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Physical symbols of solidarity - This pertains to things like holding hands in public, you know, that kind of stuff that falls to the wayside when children come along and your hands are filled with other people and things.

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Civility and courtesy - This was something I was counseled about by my dad before the Warden and I were married. He explained that there were some things that, no matter how familiar you become with your spouse, need to be continued--pleases and thank yous and other things along those lines.

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Anticipation of the other's needs. Trying to fill those needs before the other says anything - I must say that the Warden is VERY good at this, but I also must say that this, for some reason, is so much easier to do for people you don't live with everyday. Don't get me wrong. He does fine. It's the other partner in this companionship that sometimes loses focus.

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Time set aside that is committed to the other person - This will be a fun one to do--date nights, nightly chats, those kinds of things.

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Consistent communication. It locks in things like goals. Expressions of gratitude - I honestly can't remember what this one was all about. I'm sure it could go together with #5, but communication is such a HUGE factor in the ol' three-legged race that it needs to have a place to itself.

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Affection - again, this could go with physical symbols of solidarity, but this one goes a bit further. This is more personal affection; #2 is meant for the public.

Open and honest dialog - Huh, what do you know? Another communication trait. We, with many of these contemplated combining them, but they were important enough to mention the first time through, and we can definitely work further on similar things in a different way. This aspect is meant as full disclosure.

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Being together whenever possible. A desire to be together - Okay, I look at this now and think how do you set goals to control your inner desire to be with each other? To be honest, I really do think it fits in with my dad's words "act as if." I remember the Warden and I going our separate ways off to work when we were first married, and I'd think about him at any point during the day and get instant butterflies. I'd love to have those feelings again. I wonder if adding these things we did when we dated and were first married back into our relationship will bring those feelings back. I hope they do.

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Gentleness. Concern for the other's welfare.

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Recognizing that neither of us are perfect. Forgiveness and understanding.

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Charity--patience, long suffering, forgiveness, kindness, keeping the long-term vision - In charity, it seems that many times we have to look past the here and now. We need to be able to see what eternity holds--things far better than this world can offer.

After completing the list, one thing seemed very clear to me. More than anything else, we need to be able to picture ourselves as this kind of couple. There needs to be a continual renewal of the vision we're trying to attain.

I am starting to understand that the part of something that exists in your brain is more than half the battle of seeing it through. What is it they say? "Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve" (Napoleon Hill). Yup. That's a true statement.

At this point, we're working on the tasks that will fit for each trait. Those will be the next to come.

Eternity Starts Now: My 2013 Goal

I was born when my parents had been married for 21 years. I never saw them fight that I can remember. By the time I came along, most of the bugs, I'm sure, had already been worked out of their relationship. That, and I'm pretty sure that if they were unhappy with each other, they were smart enough to express their feelings away from us kids.

When I got married, I knew I hadn't gotten the whole picture of just what marriage is. Marriage, to me, seemed effortless.

My cute niece posted the above picture on Facebook yesterday. I saw it and laughed. This is me and the Warden. I really married a good man. He loves me and treats me like a queen. Maybe, because of him, my children get a fairly blissful view of marriage at this point in their lives too.

I was speaking to my brother a number of months back. He told me that as he sat around church one Sunday, he looked around at the couples sitting together and noticed that not one of them looked truly in love. He shared that if he was going to be with his wife for eternity, he wanted to be in love with her right now and everyday from now until then (although, we all know there is no "then" where eternity is concerned--eternity is now).

This idea has been percolating in my mind all this time.

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Finally, about a month ago, I shared this with the Warden. He said that marriage is a three-legged race and that, in order to cross the finish line successfully (just a little truth for you...there is no finish line), we have to be in sync. We have to be working together at all times.

We tried to envision just what we thought a celestial couple might look and act like. We, ironically, ended up with twelve characteristics. We are devising a plan so that each trait has a simple act that can be performed during each week of 2013.

In March, the Warden and I will have been married for 21 years. I really wonder, will my children think the way about us that I pictured my parents? Will they think marriage is all sunshine and roses? My hope is that they will become aware of the little changes that we'll be making this coming year. I hope they will get to experience a marriage of sunshine and roses brought about by small daily and weekly conscious choices.