Painful to watch, yes, but please don't tell me you've never felt like this poor girl before. This is me more often than not. That's why I write. Here, I can get it all down and erase and go again as often as I want to. Phew!
This morning, my mind was drawn to beauty pageants because I'm desiring peace on earth...."such as"....
I'm not worried about we, as "U.S. Americans." I'm not worried about "South Africa and Iraq and everywhere, like, such as." I am, however, concerned for my little world, my little madhouse, maybe I can even pinpoint it to...me. Where does my influence begin, and where does it end? That's what I'm concerned for. That's really all I can be interested in.
I analyze this hope and desire of every beauty queen out there, and every time, I come to the same conclusion....It begins with me, no matter how much I try to find a scapegoat and push it off on someone else, it just doesn't work. It always becomes my personal responsibility. This really is "all about me."
The interesting thing is, it also applies to the post I wrote last night--"I Am."
If I can view myself in certain ways, I can have peace. That peace, then, is untouchable. It is unalterable by anyone outside me. I am the only one who can disturb my peace. I am the only one who can change who I am.
This is how "we will be able to build up our future."
It all begins with "I am."
There's my beauty pageant answer for you today and everyday...."I personally believe."