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Sunday, March 31, 2013


I'm home from church today. It's Easter. I got up with all kinds of great aspirations of what this day would be to my family. So much of what I've been learning lately has emphasized the importance of having and upholding family traditions. There have been many traditions that we started with our oldest  that I have let go through time--through laziness; through being overwhelmed. I am now kicking myself. I know. I do that a lot.

Kicking myself, though, eventually leads to kicking myself in the rear end and restarting. I am working on allowing myself to begin again--to not give up.

Today, particularly, I'm sad that I gave up the Easter dress (and shirt and tie) tradition. Next year, my boys and husband will have new shirts and ties, my girls and I will have new dresses. I'm determined. I just think it makes this day that much more important and special.

I got up and put some caramel rolls into the crockpot and got the sausages out to thaw. I put the Easter baskets by each child's bed--thank goodness they slept in because so did I. I think our vacation wore us all out. It's taking us a few days to recover. I'm glad we returned a day early.

I stopped taking a medication the other day. It's been affecting my stomach in a very bad way. I'm now waiting for the effects to stop, but instead, it's getting worse. I'm hoping that this is just a "darkest before the dawn" scenario.

I have things I want to share. So many thoughts and experiences have been happening and teaching me. I feel that I've allowed myself to get distracted through the dark winter and now that the sun is out and the clouds are dissipating, I have a new vision for what I want life to become. I have more energy and more desire to change and make life what I want it to be.

This is what I feel that I need to write about. I need to make sure I jot down these lessons, so that I can come back and refer to them and learn from them especially when its dark and cloudy and I start to lose my way.

Here are a few key words (for my future reference), so I can remember all that I need to write about:
**small and simple things
**looking beyond the mark
**Julie B. Beck--"A Mother Heart" and "Mothers Who Know"
**Being the "lead"
**Mt. Baldy
**Planning - ridemax
**Organizing - a house of order
**Forgiving myself/beginning NOW
**Envisioning and brainstorming (day dreaming)

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