My hope in sharing these things is that I can look back and see how far we've come. I also hope that other moms might learn to avoid some of the mistakes I make. I do need to state, however, that when things do finally go right, it's only because they've gone wrong in the past, and I've learned from that mistake. So thankful for do-overs.
As I dropped this child off to school, I asked what I had done to deserve such ugly words, and it was announced, "I hate school." That was how we parted this morning.
I got to moving, and I have to admit, I didn't have such a skip in my step as I've had for the past few days. It was tough to keep going. Soon, though, the chime rang as a text came in. I read it: "Mom, can we talk after school today?"
I know well enough that putting my children into corners doesn't solve anything. It only puts us on opposite sides of an issue. When all is said and done, my job is to help them face the truth and then help them create solutions.
When all came to light, this child knew that I was on his/her side. The child knew that the answers had all been created by him/herself.
I was so glad or that first text and glad to know that I really wasn't the problem. As this child has returned home, things are much improved and the solutions are starting to take shape. There is a good chance that it is too late to completely solve this particular problem, but the great thing, as I look it, is the fact that this child faced his/her own problem by his/herself, created feasible options as solutions and is now taking charge and responsibility to past mistakes. All it took on my part was putting up with some rudeness and asking a lot of questions. Heck, if it was always this easy, I think I might be able to undertake this kind of thing every day.