While the Troops are Away

Head's spinning with thoughts and ideas. Forgive me while I let them out....gotta relieve some pressure.

image: advantagerealestate.com

Originally, the plan was that we were all going to go to the beach for Memorial Day weekend, but as things started to come together, it ended up that our three oldest each had commitments here in town. The plan became that the Warden would take the youngest kids to the beach, and I would stay behind with #s 1, 2, and 3.

As it turned out, I have accomplished SO much that I wouldn't have otherwise. It's astounding how much I use my children as an excuse not to do things. Sad, I know.

Yesterday, I was able to finish almost all of the laundry (and it was a HUGE amount), go through #7's clothes and organize them into her drawers, clean a portion of the garage, clean out the bookshelves, clean out all of the bathroom drawers in the kids' bathroom, make huge progress on painting #6's bedroom, and got through an ENORMOUS amount of paper.

If I ever become a hoarder, it will be because the paper will eventually overcome and win the battle that I attempt to fight every day. Man, oh man!

We sat and watched a couple movies last night. While we watched, I sorted paper.  Most of it got recycled, but there was still a lot to file. Wow! I seriously have a paper fear.

I figure I have one more day. I'm going to finish filing papers, clean out the fridge, clean out the other bathrooms' storage areas, help the girls go through their stuff, finish the laundry and fold it and put it away, go grocery shopping, and treat #3 and myself to a mini shopping trip.

image: dressingyourtruth.com

I pulled #3 into the Dressing Your Truth thing. She's super excited about it, so as a treat, we're going to
buy ourselves one item that fits our type. I'm a 1; she's a 3.

image: thechicfashionista.com

There are secondary types too, but I haven't figured those out yet. I remember when I was a teenager, there was a similar kind of typing. They'd take different colors and hold them just under your face. If they looked good on you, they could figure out which "season" you were. I was a spring but was considered a "cool spring" because I could wear winter colors too. Today, I read something that said these can be compared with the season system.

Type 1s are springs, so that fit perfectly. I thought I was a secondary type 2, but that I have so many strong opinions and am constantly fighting myself about whether to write them or not, I figure I might just be a secondary 4, which would be a winter. That fits also.

image: mindtools.com

So looking forward to tomorrow and getting more done around here before the troops return. NEVER again will I let the paper overtake me like it has up to this point. Filing that stuff is going to be a huge priority tomorrow. While I'm working on that and the other things I listed, the kids'll be finishing the touching up and trim for #6's room. It's going to feel so good to get these big projects done!

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An Awesome Experience for My Kids

I drove up to the high school, dropped my big kids off in the usual place, found a parking spot, and climbed out with my little kids to head to the preschool this morning.

I could hear country music playing. Standing in front of the main doors to the school was a color guard of high school students in their everyday clothes. Each had a flag. There was also an enormous flag hanging down from the front of the school.

It was clear that the music I was hearing was patriotic, but it was a song I hadn't heard before.

image: wikipedia.com

I saw an old man backing his car in as we walked across the parking lot and headed toward the wing where the preschool is situated. About this time, I also heard the words: "Color guard, attention!" I didn't watch what happened at this point as I was trying to get my little ones across the parking lot safely, but shortly thereafter, I looked and saw an older woman heading toward the stairs.

It was clear that something very special was happening today.

Then I remembered #2 telling me he was going to what I think he referred to as "Living History Day." Once I recalled this, I realized what was happening.....Veterans from past wars were arriving and they were being honored as they entered the school.

What an awesome thing!

image: oregonlive.com

I have to admit I got a bit teary as I walked past all of this this morning. Wars continue and people continue to serve us selflessly. How great for my kids to get to hear the first-hand accounts of history from people such as these.

How wonderful that they are honored in such ways, and we become blessed by their efforts.

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Tantrum to Tranquility

image: flickr.com

I've shared the fact that one of my children has some anger management issues, right? Well....I believe we're finally on the right track. I thought maybe I wasn't giving him enough attention and in order to deal with his anger, I needed to give him more affection and love and patience. I did. All I got was a lot more anger from him. My heart was getting softer, his was getting harder. I didn't get it.

Like happens so often, a couple weeks ago, I had an a-ha moment. Clearly, what I was doing just wasn't helping. Again, we go back to this:

Thanks, Al!

What I was doing was showing forth a whole lotta love, but the logic was sorely missing. It just didn't

image: tumbler.com

make sense. I was being a doormat...a marshmallow. What I was teaching my son was that he was in charge.

What it all boiled down to was the fact that while I was stressing over him, I was getting nothing done. Things were falling into more and more disorganization. This just wasn't fair. He was sucking away my time AND my energy.

Enough was ENOUGH!

Confession, this morning was so tough that I went up to my room, threw myself onto my knees by my bed and told God that I was DONE. I had my little temper tantrum before the Lord and got back up. I will be honest, though, I was truly wondering how I was going to handle it all. 

As I walked back downstairs, I remembered something I'd used with kids in that past. Suddenly, I had a little trick up my sleeve (a strategy, if you will). I was in charge of the situation and that helped me to regather the peace required. I went at it all surprisingly calmly. 

I realized that I needed to return to the "energy suck" mentality because literally, that's what he was doing. I hadn't had to pull this card on any of my children in so long, I'd forgotten all about it. You know, the old "You're sucking away my energy, and the only way to refill it is to do some of the work I would be doing if I had more energy?" Yah, that one.

In other words, when this child freaks out, a job is required. You'd think this would make the anger worse, but as the jobs pile up, all I have to do is hold up fingers for how many jobs, and he cools right down. What I've really learned, though, is to never let him see me sweat. I have to be as calm and cool as can be, and sometimes, that's SUPER hard. 

The other thing I have discovered, though, is that I have to have some kind of goal to work toward--"These must be done before you can go to bed," "I'm making cookies this afternoon. If you'd like to join in, your jobs will have to be done," etc.

So far, so good. I think the added perk is that when he successfully finishes a job, he truly feels good about himself; thus reducing the anger even more.

It's been a rough morning this morning. We got all the way up to ten jobs, but I guess I should clarify....

It's been a rough morning...for him. For me, once I got off my knees, it's been pretty darned blissful.

Never did I think I'd thank my son for his anger issues, but man, they're really paying off. Life around here is quite a bit more peaceful and things are starting to really shape up.

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Shout Out: Julia Shinkle

This is one of those posts that has sat in the background WAY too long. As I attached the new family photo at the top of this blog this evening, I remembered writing this unfinished post and decided that I'd better get it done. So, here you go....


Two mission buddies (who ended up marrying) sent their oldest son to the Missionary Training Center today. Wow! It's just blowing my mind that I met them both when we weren't much older than our oldest children are now.

They have a beautiful family. It's so fun to see where life has taken them in the past number of years. I got to looking at the photos they recently had taken before their son left for the MTC and got to thinking about how before #1 leaves, we HAVE to have some family pictures taken, which is the cause for today's shout out.


When I think of family pictures, I automatically think of my friend Julia. She does AMAZING work. She's creative and fun. She takes the simple things and turns them into works of art.  I have to share a couple of our experiences with Julia....

The first time she ever photographed our family, #7 had just been born. Julia called me and asked if she could come take photos of #7 for her portfolio (she was just starting her business). When she came, things were easy and relaxed. She used items we had around the house--baby blankets, a drawer, wooden blocks, etc. It was clear that Julia wasn't just a photographer. She was an artist. Her approach was beyond creative.

In 2011, after receiving my nomination as Oregon's Young Mother of the Year, which later turned into a Mother of the Year nomination (long story having everything to do with the age of my oldest child and nothing to do with my expertness of being a mother--as if I even had to explain that to you), I was informed that one thing I would have to do is turn in some family photos and photos of myself. I immediately thought of Julia, but going from one child to photograph, who pretty much slept the entire time, to a big ol' family of nine? Ugh! How would that go? Would she even be able to get one click with all of us behaving ourselves?....Yah, good luck on that one.

Here are some of the images from that session.....

I love this spontaneous, unstaged catch.

One child climbed on and Julia told everyone else to gather 'round. This was the result.

This was my absolute favorite:

Julia asked me if I'd brought any kinds of snacks. I told her that I had a bag of Cheerios in a bag in my purse. She asked if I would get them. I did. Next thing I knew, she had us all standing shoulder to shoulder in a random, however we placed ourselves, order and sat #7 in front of us on the ground. You can't see them, but there are Cheerios all around her. That's why her hand is to her mouth--she's eating a Cheerio.

In the meantime, there's Julia laying on the ground across from us snapping pictures of our legs and little Cheerio-munching #7. Love it!

Next, it came time for #1's senior portraits. For this one, we went out to Julia's property. Again, easy, relaxed. Here are some of my favorites:

I'm looking forward to #2 having this experience this coming year.

I decided that with #1 leaving for college, we needed to have a family session to capture us all as we were before our first flew the nest.

I have often posted the photo on the right, but I haven't shared how that photo came to be. It actually started out with the experience on the left. I was just sitting there. Actually, I think Julia was taking my photo. I was sitting alone. Along came two children. They started hugging on me and then Julia, observing this, called the whole crew over. Thus, the photo on the right.

I love that Julia can take a random event and turn it into something worth keeping and cherishing. I love that she can take a squirrely family like ours and find those moments when we all look just a little bit sane....

but then, there are those moments when we don't all get that memo.....

Thank you, Julia! I simply ADORE you!!!