New Found Time. Darn It!

Do I have a blog for you!

I woke at 4am with my heart beating fast. This doesn't happen very often any more, but in an attempt to figure out just what's causing the adrenaline rush, I get up and check all areas of the house. I check the doors, windows, and each child. I swear that I must have become aware of something in the conscious world while in my unconscious state, but that rarely, if ever, ends up being true. I climb back into bed afterward still wondering why I'm awake, and I try to fall back asleep. In all reality, my heart's still going so fast, there's no way sleep is going to happen, but I do give it a sporting chance. I really do.

This morning, I finally figured this whole pattern out. The insomnia I've been experiencing is nothing more than a spazzy heart that won't calm down. Well, it does, but by then it's time for the kids to get up, so sleep is no longer an option.

Shortly after I climbed back into bed this morning and pondered on my reality, I surrendered to that reality. I decided I'd probably better do something with this new found time. Time that I really wanted to spend unconsciously dreaming about happy things--butterflies and rainbows, stuff like that.

So, instead I read Jacob 5 and got about 15 verses in as I tried to decipher all of the symbols and meanings behind things and what they meant to me personally. This took me half an hour. That should have put me sleep, right?  Nope.

I finished reading the last talk from this past General Conference (well the last one on the list at the church website), which I had started reading the other night. Gotta make sure my daughter rereads this one sometime soon. Still no sleep.

Better yet, as I studied these things, I picked my life apart. If you weren't aware, I do this on a regular basis. Crazy? Maybe. Perfectionist? Maybe. Trying to be better than I was yesterday? Definitely. But, I think a little sleep would be a really great step in the right direction if I'm going to be any good at all today. Ah well. Get over it, right? It ain't gonna happen.

I decided months and months and months ago that I need to simplify my life in order to get more out of it. Not to mention, I figure, a little less stress might just help my sleep patterns. I'm doing pretty good with this desire toward simplicity. While I searched for more clues as to what to continue and where to move next on this quest, I ran across this article from this blog. I've been to this blog before when I was trying to figure the whole minimalist experiment out, but I particularly like the article I read today.

There are 72 ideas. I'm excited about taking these a piece at a time. I'm looking forward to reading the links from the post. I have time without children this morning, so once I wake from my nap (yah, right), I'm diving in. First, I'll have to finish reading the list. I'm only up to #46.

My eyelids are heavy, and I'm ready to roll back over and go to sleep. The Warden's gone off to play basketball, so I have the whole bed to myself. It'd be the perfect chance, but it's 6:20 and I just heard #7 down the hall, in her bedroom, yawning. 

Time to get up.  **Sigh**