School has been canceled because of snow. It's 7:20 in the morning, everyone but one boy, reading in his bed, is still sleeping. I have been awake since 5am. Husband seems to be ill, so even though it's a day off for everyone else, life remains the same; although, maybe a wee bit more complicated--taking care of a sick husband while trying to keep the noise level down with six extra people in the house--for me.
I want to stray from the specific missionary-related topics I've been writing on lately. The next bunch of things I have to write about are tricky. They are important and a bit sensitive, so I'm not quite sure how to get them down in writing.
I guess, for today, I just want to write about randomness (I have no clue where this is going to go)….
I have learned over the past few years just how vitally important my role is. I am the queen bee. I am the line drawer. If something's going to happen around here, I'm the instigator, the planner, the scheduler, the follow-through-er. I am it.
Some may say, where's your husband in all of this? But let's be real. He has his own world at work. That's where he's in charge. It's there that he has to instigate, plan, schedule, etc. He doesn't do that in both places. He shouldn't have to, and he's not here most of the time….I am. I have the full picture of just how our home runs.
I have been learning the importance of obedience, and not just obedience, quick and exact obedience. These are values I learned from childhood, but I don't believe my parents required them as much as I do from my own children, and lately, I'll admit, I've been slacking….BIG TIME!
I learned how very vital obedience is on my mission. This is one thing I appreciate #1's Mission President for. He is very much like my mission presidents. Obedience is job one. Once I learned, hearing from other missionary parents, that he was all about missionaries being obedient, I was able to relax and enjoy the ride. I knew my daughter was in the right place under the right leadership. I knew she'd be safe and that she'd learn life's important lessons.
As a parent, I figure my role is to show my kids just a glimpse of what God might be like. Not that I'm their god, but my character traits should be so close to His in justice, mercy, kindness, generosity, consistency, etc.--inasmuch as a human being can muster these characteristics--that they come to know Him by interacting with me. I figure my example is CRUCIAL to how they learn to trust and how they grow to be moral people.
One thing I want for my children is what #1 is now experiencing day-to-day. She's learning, in real time, to trust God. She is learning to listen with her whole heart. She is learning to obey the voices that she hears as they strike her mind and her heart at the same time. She is also learning from her mistakes as she, at times, ignores some of those whisperings she receives. This, to me, is one reason why I want my children to choose to serve missions. This is why I think it's so important.
For now, in my home, they learn to obey me in preparation to learning to obey God. Like I said before, I sometimes slack on my job. I have noticed that the words, "Yah, I'll get to it" and "Just a minute" and sometimes, heaven forbid, even outright "No" are used increasingly around this house. I am learning, the hard way, that this cannot be. I need to rally my troops and bring them back to where they need to be.
I figure our home is their training ground. I realize that if they can learn to say, "Okay, Mom" and "I'm on it" and "Coming" now, while they're in my home, the greater the chance is that, when they're out on their own, they'll be able to say "Yes" and "Here I am" when they are called and sent forward by a greater power….Not just on their missions but in life in general.
This is what I desire for my children. This is what I want for their futures--that they might recognize the voice of God and learn to follow it obediently throughout their lives.
Now, to take care of the sickie and hold down the din. Off to send some kids out to the snow….and off to figure out just how to write these upcoming posts…..
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